I usually spend two mornings every week hanging out in suspended silky red hammocks with the poetic ShreepaRani. You didn’t read that wrong, we practice Antigravity Yoga together. While we often chat about different things going on in our lives before and after our practice, ShreepaRani can read how I’m feeling without me saying anything. I look forward to our sound healing therapy sessions, filled with peaceful vibrations as I lay still, in floating Shavaasana. This story of vibrant, red Gajar ka Halwa takes me back to our conversations in those silky, red hammocks.

It was a Sunday morning, something got a hold of my heart. The weather was just right, slightly chilly but fine. “Quiet in the neighborhood”, I thought to myself. It was one of those days where my heart ruled my head and woke me up. My feet led me straight to the kitchen, “Sunday isn’t it?”, a voice within me echoed. I was determined to make the day feel unlike the rest. I peeped in the fridge, I had lots of milk. There were leftover carrots too. I ate only salad that week, so carrots were my energy boosters. Opening a few cabinets, I dug up a can of condensed milk. I reached for some almonds & cardamom too. My heart was leading all of this; no analyzing no thinking,  just following my heart!

Looking Back

My heart had lured me to make gajar ka halwa (Indian carrot pudding). My heart knows well what words can’t say. I was feeling homesick and this was one of my favorites that my mom used to make. It had become a winter essential. We pack it with seasonal red, juicy and delicious carrots. My mom used to use this pudding as a trick – I was young and fussy, she wanted to get me to eat carrots. And boy, did it work!

I prepared myself by collecting everything that I needed. Mixing in the right proportions of ghee, milk , condensed milk and grated carrots, I blended them together which gave the mixture a beautiful consistency. A familiar aroma filled my kitchen. I continued stirring and added in the crushed cardamom to the mix. All infused into each other, it left a subtle, mildly spicy scent. Slightly nutty, slightly sweet, a woody aroma that not only lingers in the kitchen and the living room but also captivates me.

Looking Ahead

Something that comforts me into my own space, diving into a bowl of this warm halwa makes me feel the presence of being home away from home. I continue this tradition, reminiscing, the love my mother poured into it. Blended with passion and stirred with a heart-full of warmth and care, Gajar ka halwa is being relished even today by my mother’s grandchildren!

The Feeling of Home, my heart knows well what words can’t say!
A silent smile, a touch of warmth in every bite, as I savor to my soul’s delight!

Written by ShreepaRani Bhansali and edited by Jashan Sippy.

‘Food, the Feeling of Home’: A series of stories exploring nostalgia, the power of food, our memories and stories of ‘home’. Want to share your story? Send it to us at info@sugarandspace.in